It's just one of those post where I need to ramble and get things off of my chest. I know these post are probably annoying if you read them, but it's just one of those days. :(
So Jesse McCartney's "It's Over" just came on my pandora channel and it pretty much fits how I feel. So I will start with this -- I think what hurts me the most about this break up, is the fact that I thought that he was the one. I was so inlove and no one would ever come and take his place. He made me feel like a princess in so many ways. I also realized that he much pretended to be someone he wasn't to get me to date him.After a few months, he stopped being sweet which is how he got me to begin with. It's like Prince Charming and Cinderella, except in this story Prince Charming never came to bring Cinderella her glass slipper. I know that I am a strong person, but it is so hard to meet up with him and watch him cry because of issues that go so much deeper than me and him. It's like I want to be the superhero, but I can't. &- you know they say that 'actions speak louder than words' and that is so true when it come to him. He will say one thing and act completely different. It's so hard to just walk away. But I need to, because God has shown me so many different things to make me finally wake up and realize "HEY HE ISN'T GOOD FOR YOU."
So Jesse McCartney's "It's Over" just came on my pandora channel and it pretty much fits how I feel. So I will start with this -- I think what hurts me the most about this break up, is the fact that I thought that he was the one. I was so inlove and no one would ever come and take his place. He made me feel like a princess in so many ways. I also realized that he much pretended to be someone he wasn't to get me to date him.After a few months, he stopped being sweet which is how he got me to begin with. It's like Prince Charming and Cinderella, except in this story Prince Charming never came to bring Cinderella her glass slipper. I know that I am a strong person, but it is so hard to meet up with him and watch him cry because of issues that go so much deeper than me and him. It's like I want to be the superhero, but I can't. &- you know they say that 'actions speak louder than words' and that is so true when it come to him. He will say one thing and act completely different. It's so hard to just walk away. But I need to, because God has shown me so many different things to make me finally wake up and realize "HEY HE ISN'T GOOD FOR YOU."
One day I will find someone that will love me the right way. He won't have to lie and pretend to be something he's not to get me to fall inlove with him, because I will fall inlove with the REAL him. Sure we will fight and bicker about dumb little nonsense things, but I will never doubt that he loves me. I will be able to trust him from the very beginning because I know that he won't hurt me in the way that I have been hurt my entire life since I was little. I hope that he would never give me a reason to not trust him. We will watch cartoons together and cuddle on the couch and watch movies and eat popcorn. He won't get mad at me when I want to just lay in bed instead of go out. He won't smoke and get mad at me when I won't go outside with him while he smokes. &- He will believe in God. I mean we will have the same beliefs and he won't mind actually going to church with me on Sunday mornings. We can cook together and get each other messy and do silly things. It'd be amazing. That's what I want. I want what the 60 year olds have today --> & I know that you don't have that as soon as you're married and/or dating. You have to work for it and work at it every day. But one day, I will have that. I will know that who I married was the one and I'd never regret a single moment. 
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